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Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

Explosions in the Sky’s “Postcards From 1952” Made Weep and Orgasm Simultaneously

Have you guys seen this redonk music video from Austin-based Explosions in the Sky yet?

It will cause you to instantly weep and orgasm at the same time.

The music video was created by the very talented Austin filmmakers Peter Simonite and Annie Gunn. This is the sort of artistic creation that makes you wonder what the hell you’re doing with your life.

 

Film, Pop Culture

Meeting David Duchovny Reminded Me of What A X-Files Nerd I Was

Last Friday I met David Duchovny.

I have no photographic evidence of this because I met him while he was shooting a scene in his boxer briefs.

There was a lot of hubbub surrounding me meeting David Duchovny from my family and friends. They remembered what a hopeless, pathetic X-files nerd I was between the ages of 10-19. My Dad’s girlfriend, who works on Californication, told me to have my mother ship out any X-files paraphernalia and David would gladly sign them when I met him. My Mom would have happily obliged if I asked her. In fact, she spent most of the week leading up to me meeting David Duchovny telling everyone in our hometown.

As a 28 year-old who previously worked for celebrities, I would never in a million years walk up to David Duchovny with my Australia edition of the Rolling Stone that features he and Gillian Anderson in bed together or my Agent Mulder action figure from Fight the Future and ask him to sign it. That is not a freak flag I want to freely wave to the (more…)

Film, Pop Culture

Sexy Goldbluming (The New Planking)

Ok.

I’m going to submit a photo to this:

SEXY GOLDBLUMING!

A new “planking” in the form of reenacting your favorite Jeff Goldblum pose.

But I need your help in deciding what photo to replicate.

Leave your choice in the comments!

Also, if anyone wants to help take the photo, that would be great. I can’t guarantee what will happen when I bring out the Goldblum Sexiness though. It might kill you.

1.)

2.)

3.)

Film, Pop Culture

How to Be Jeff Goldblum

The other day I thought, “I wish I was Jeff Goldblum.”

I mean, who doesn’t have that thought, right?

Goldblum is gold…and blum.

Translation: Jeff Goldblum is a golden flower.

Everything about him just oozes awkward sexy golden Jew flower man and who doesn’t love that? Who? WHO!? TELL ME!!!

When I watch clips of Jeff Goldblum, I think, “I want to be like that. I want to smirk and fondle the air and sniff people.”

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve had a secret quest to turn myself into a middle-aged Jewish man. When I was small, it was Rod Serling and several Marx Brothers. Now, it’s the Blum.

I’ve been a Goldblum fan for a long time. I distinctly recall having a feeling similar to that of climbing the rope in gym class while watching Jeff Goldblum for the first time in Jurassic Park. After that, I ran out and rented every Goldblum movie I could get my grubby little hands on: Vibes, Earth Girls Are Easy, The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai, Into the Night etc. all (more…)

20-Something, Film, Pop Culture

I’m Jealous of Lena Dunham. There. I Said It.

After finding myself rolling my eyes at yet another Internet ad for HBO’s new series, Girls, I had to finally admit to myself that my aversion to Lena Dunham is because I’m utterly and completely jealous of her.

I’ve never wanted to be that girl who dislikes other girls simply because they have something I don’t. I try to be supportive of my gender because we girls need to look out for one another. I think Dunham said it herself in a recent interview, “a success for one woman is a success for all of us.”

Or she could have not said that, I’m not sure. I’ve read so many freaking articles about her lately, I can’t keep track. But if she did say that, maybe she’s right. Maybe she’ll pave the way for us narcissistic twenty-somethings who love talking about our less than unique neuroses and “problems.” We need a champion, damnit!

Or maybe she just fucked us all.

My contention with Dunham developed after viewing the first 20 minutes of her freshman feature, Tiny Furniture. My initial (more…)

Film, Pop Culture

Come Back, Rick Moranis! (and Deborah Foreman, Phoebe Cates and Tim Curry)

My little nugget

Do you ever find yourself catching an old flick and wondering, “Oh man, where did that actor disappear to?” Then you scramble to Wikipedia only to find out that they died of bone cancer in 1978 and you become completely despondent for the rest of the evening (John Cazale anyone?)

Sometimes actors or actresses don’t have as sad of a fate as Cazale, but they simply stop acting or fizzle out. Sometimes we miss them. The guys and gals listed below don’t need to make a “comeback.” A comeback makes it sound like they fell out of favor with society and they’ve been thrust into the naughty corner until society says they can come out — no, they simply need to come back. Come back into our lives and make us whole again.

Here are a list of actor and actresses I liked to see put back on first billing:

Rick Moranis

I could write an entire post about The Moranis, or as I like to call him, “My Little Nugget”….

CONTINUE…

Film, Music, Pop Culture

R. Kelly Aims To Wow Your Panties Off With New Installment of Trapped in the Closet

 

I’ve been waiting for this news my entire life.

The next installment of R. Kelly’s “Trapped in the Closet” will premiere on IFC next year.

If you’ve never seen the first 22 chapters of R. Kelly’s “Trapped in the Closet”, I feel sorry for you. You’ve lived a sad and sheltered life.

“Trapped in the Closet” follows the dramatic tale of Sylvester (R. Kelly/narrator), Gwendolyn (Sylvester’s wife), Cathy (a lady Sylvester cheated with), Rufus (Cathy’s pastor husband), Chuck (Rufus’ lover), Big Man (a midget), Bridget (Big Man’s Southern wife) and Pimp Lucious (R.Kelly again) as they all cheat on, love on and point guns on each other. The characters are voiced by R.Kelly in a NEVER-ENDING, MIND-NUMBING CYCLE OF THE SAME SONG FOR 90 MINUTES STRAIGHT.

“Trapped in the Closet” falls under the cult classics that are so unbelievably f’ing terrible that they come across as brilliant. Believe me, after you watch “Trapped in the Closet”, R. Kelly will become your creative role (more…)

Austin, Film, Hipstercrite Life, Pop Culture

Does SXSW Give You Anxiety?!

Does SXSW give you ragin’ anxiety like it does for me?

I have something to clear off my flat chest.

After all this talk of blogging about SXSW- I can’t do it.

You know why?

Because I’ve already fizzled out.

My little motor has died and I already buried it in the backyard along with the feral cats of East Austin.

I don’t care enough about the hottest app, movie, party or show and scrambling back to regurgitate it all to you. I pretended like I cared a lot, but I’m realizing I don’t. Maybe that makes me a bad blogger, journalist or social media whore, but so be it.

When you live in Austin and work in or around the creative industries, you feel as though you’re supposed to squeeze SXSW by the nuts and get every last drop out of ’em. As a writer, screenwriter and social media nerd, it would be silly for me not to take full advantage of the festival, right? To go on 3 hours sleep every night, be drunk most of the time and trying to nudge my way into the hottest parties, (more…)

Austin, Film, Pop Culture

SXSW Film Begins! What to Watch Friday, March 9th

SXSW is here…and it’s rainy as shit! Unfortunately, I have to work tonight so I won’t be seeing any films, but Geoff got up early to get his express passes for Josh Whedon’s Cabin the Woods at the Paramount. If I were able to see films tonight, I’d skip out on Cabin in the Woods and check out the narrative Electrick Children (State Theater) by New York filmmaker Rebecca Thomas.

If you’re attending SXSW Film this year, I’ll be at the opening party at Buffalo Billiard’s tonight. Hope to see you there!

Here are my list of go-to screenings tonight. I starred the ones you should make priority.

Cabin in the Woods– 7PM @ Paramount

Five friends go to a remote cabin in the woods. Bad things happen. If you think you know this story, think again. From fan favorites Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard comes THE CABIN IN THE WOODS, a mind blowing horror film that turns the genre inside out.

Produced by Whedon and directed by Goddard from a script by both, the film stars Kristen Connolly, (more…)

Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture, Writing

The #1 Thing Austinites Want To Achieve At SXSW 2012

SXSW kicks off tomorrow and it got me thinking, “What is the #1 thing I want to achieve at the festival this year?”

My goal is to watch Dave Foley piss on the side of a building again. Or if I’m really lucky, it will be a tag-team of Dave Foley AND Willem Dafoe peeing all over 6th Street.

I asked some of my fave Austin bloggers and movers & shakers what their goals are for this year’s SXSW.

Take a look at their tips below!

Cathy Benavides/Found of Austin Slave to Fashion: “I am most looking forward to meeting and chatting with people in the fashion community for Style X. Last year was a great kick off for Style X and they have lined up some great speakers and designers for this year. Fashion is invading SXSW and it warms my cold black heart!”

Chris Apollo Lynn/Founder of Republic of Austin: “During SX, people want to achieve everything from seeing a set number of bands to imbibing hella free booze. I’ve found that setting expectations can either lead to long lines or (more…)