Writing

The Best Blog Posts of 2010

Hot damn. I can’t believe this year is over.

It was an eventful year, to say the least.

I was let go of one job, immediately found work at another job, and then left that job for a job in publishing. The artist/dreamer side of me should have taken THAT FREAKIN’ UNEMPLOYMENT, but being raised the way I was and the current state of the economy, I decided it was best to, you know, be a working adult. I’m excited to see where my new job will take me.

I road tripped through West Texas and New Mexico with my mother. We wanted to strangle each other and at one point I had to take a *pee in the middle of the desert, off the side of the road, in front of everyone driving on the God forsaken New Mexico highway known as I-25. It was a memorable trip full of romantic meth villages and endless horizons.

I was voted Blogger of the Year in Austin and Hipstercrite won the category of “Best Blog to Find Comments or Discussions” over at the Austin Blogger Awards. Though she may try, Hipstercrite (more…)

December 29, 2010 by
20-Something, Hipstercrite Life

When the Flame Faltered

Most of the time she doesn’t think about how she’d like to be in love.

Except for those nights when she watches a movie where the lead characters walk hand-in-hand through Central Park. Or where the man realizes he made a huge mistake and jumps a plane ride back to his love. Or where a couple banter like Tracy and Hepburn. Or where a woman decides that he is the one. Or when someone who may or may not be Cary Grant holds the object of his desire in his arms and won’t let go.

Sometimes the thought enters her mind when she reads a book like Patti Smith’s Just Kids. A tragic love story that causes young women to yearn for the affection of a tortured young man. A man that they can believe in more than themselves. This sort of romantic tale makes her long for Sunday mornings in bed or Saturday nights sitting on the floor and creating.

On the occasional happenstance, she’ll acknowledge the thought when she’s sitting at the train station and sees two people completely lost in one another. (more…)

December 28, 2010 by
Hipstercrite Life

Monday My Ass

Hope everyone had a lovely holiday.
I don’t feel like writing a blog post today. I’m just going to keep on dreaming about the above view of Los Angeles I had for the past three days.
So, there ya go….

See you tomorrow.

December 27, 2010 by
Hipstercrite Life

There’s No Place Like Los Angeles for the Holidays

source

“People are afraid to merge on freeways in Los Angeles,” I will say to my father when he picks me up at LAX tomorrow morning.

“They sure are.” he’ll say.

“No, Dad. It’s a line from Bret Easton Ellis’ Less Than Zero.” I’ll think for a second. “It means that the people of Los Angeles are afraid to interact with others. It’s much easier to hold back and stay to yourself then joining the other kids on the playground.”

My Dad will nod with indifferent acknowledgment. He’s just happy to see me.

“Or it means that Angelenos really suck at driving. I’m not sure.”

I want to be Clay coming back to the city. However, instead of decadent holiday parties, apathetic sexual encounters, and coke-induced bloody noses, I’ll be spending time with my father. Though not a man of nihilistic behavior, he is still very much a character in a novel.

I used to carry Less Than Zero on the plane trip back home to New York during the holidays. I’d read it on my flight east and pretend that I related to the questionable (more…)

December 23, 2010 by
Hipstercrite Life

Blue Christmas

This year I will not be going home.
This Christmas is the first time in my life I will not see my family.
The combination of new job and shameful flight prices to Upstate New York is causing me to travel to Los Angeles instead to see my father. I’m very excited to see him, but considering the unconventionality of our relationship, it will be interesting to spend a holiday with him typically devoted to my mother and grandmother.

Before the arrangements were made to travel west, the idea of maybe being alone for the holidays struck me very hard. It made me contemplate what the holidays mean and made me aware of many newly formed realities in my life. Am I getting to the age where I should be creating my own holiday traditions? Am I at the age where I should actually be interested in finding a partner and having children to form these traditions?

Another reason why I was unable to see my family for the holidays is that my mother and grandmother could not travel down to Texas because of my Grandma’s (more…)

December 22, 2010 by
20-Something, Hipstercrite Life, Pop Culture

Best U.S. Cities For Young People

Last week, Forbes released their annual “Best Cities For Young Adults” list and guess who was number one?

GUESS RIGHT NOW!

Yes, it was Austin, Texas. The lovely city where beer grows on trees and we all live in a perpetual state of twenty-something whether we’re thirty-something or forty-something. Austin is like adult Disneyland- if Mickey stumbled through the park drunk, unshaven, and stroking his Stratocaster.

Besides the demographic of man-children running amok, this city truly does have a lot to offer young people. Employment at fun and innovative small business-like corporations such as Whole Foods, Sweet Leaf Tea and Gowalla, more film, art and music events than one can count on their appendages, a vibrant culture, and really really good-looking people.

Four Texas cities made it on Forbes’ list (Austin No. 1, Houston No. 2, Dallas No. 6, and San Antonio No. 9) New York, Chicago, Denver, Seattle, Atlanta, Minneapolis-St.Paul rounded out the rest. These are all good choices, (more…)

December 21, 2010 by
Writing

In Times of Creative Block, Act Like Your Idols

When I get stressed out, much like a dudebro drunk on whiskey, inspiration and creativity is not something that comes easily.

In fact, my brain just completely shuts down. During these times, I often find myself standing wide-eyed and dumbfounded when people are talking to me. You may even find me hovering in the grocery store staring at the same three shelves of salad dressings for about fifteen minutes, completely immobile. This may have more to do with the fact that there are now 400 types of salad dressings to chose from when grocery shopping and not a temporary neurological malfunction.

When I begin imitating a mentally challenged person by accident, I try to think of my idols. Having idols is important. Having heroes are important. Having people that you dress up as and fantasize about before going to sleep is important.

I’ve accumulated a lot of idols in my years. Some have left me- Beetlejuice, Elton John circa 1974, Dana Scully. Some have stayed-Woody Allen, Pee-Wee Herman, Frank (more…)

December 20, 2010 by
Film, Music, Pop Culture

Holiday Gift Ideas for the Disgustingly Rich

Say that money wasn’t an issue this holiday season. Say you could buy your loved one anything they wanted- like Vincent Gallo’s sperm or va-jay-jay perfume. What would you buy them?? If you’re loaded with moola and have no shame in spending flagrant amounts of money for no reason, here is your must-have holiday gift list below!

1.) Delorean Time Machine Conversion $23,999– I don’t even think this price includes the car. It costs $24,000 simply to have two nerds adhere some plastic tubes and a non-working flux capacitor to your Delorean. For that much money, they better include Marty McFly, George McFly, and Doc Brown blow-up dolls so I can finally live-out my…never mind.

2.) True Blood Vampire Survival Kit $699- For almost $700 you will receive: (1) Condom, (1) Lollipop, (1) Vial of fake blood and syringe, and (1) Thing of “Vamp-Aids”. With the impending take-over of vampires in the near future, this purchase seems like a sound investment to me. This underwear worn by Alexander Skarsgard (more…)

December 17, 2010 by
Hipstercrite Life, Pop Culture

Holiday Gift Ideas for the Semi-Indigent

We’re all broke. Unless you’re that asshole who is not. If so, then maybe you should stop reading my blog and start contributing financially, huh?

I certainly know that I’m broke. And not even in the, “I really have some dough set aside but am telling everyone that I can’t afford to do Christmas gifts this year” broke. Every single penny is accounted for. Except for the ones spent on ridiculous amounts of grocery store sushi.

If you’re anything like me, then you probably are wondering how you can show your love to friends and family outside of giving them a pat on the back and saying, “Thank you for looking after me when I can’t even look after myself.” Below is my list of super inexpensive gift ideas for the holidays.

1.) Pickling– I showed you yesterday how to pickle the living crap out of peppers. Who doesn’t love pickles? Who? WHO?!? Tell me right now and I will beat you with this rotten cucumber that didn’t make the next batch of pickling. You can pickle anything, really. Peppers, cucumbers, (more…)

December 15, 2010 by
20-Something, Hipstercrite Life

How to Pickle: Or Giving the Gift of Botulism for Christmas

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve had a habit of getting whims and quickly losing interest in them. Working much like a fast-moving disease, I’d tell my mother, “Mom, I’ve got the whims today!” and she would smile at me while quietly counting how many minutes it would take for me to discard whatever project I lugged out and splayed across the living room floor.

I’ve finished very few things in my life- screenplays, college, a beer, The Big Lebowski– but when I do, boy, is it a time for celebration!

Last weekend I started and finished making pickled peppers- and managed to not kill anyone in the process. Yet. At least I don’t think?

In terms of level of difficulty making pickled peppers is not hard- you buy the ingredients, you boil them, you pour them over peppers, you seal the jar- but the process can be long and boring for a young gal who is easily distracted by rays of light and cat noises off in the distance, so this accomplishment was a mighty, mighty achievement.

The (more…)

December 13, 2010 by