Back in February, I pulled a Maureen Dowd and completely lost my f’ing mind on (legal) edibles in Denver, Colorado. (I emphasize ‘legal’ for my current employers and any future employers. Hi, guys.)
Let me start by saying: I’m weed ignorant.
I believe this is how many stories begin when someone loses their shit on edibles.
“I didn’t feel anything so I started eating more…”
I guess when my boyfriend and I nervously bought the THC-filled cookies from a dispensary in the hip Highlands part of Denver, our knees shaking as we giggled like senior citizens who had just watched a porno for the first time, we must have missed the part about waiting an hour to feel the effects. We were too busy feeling like scared ass clowns.
Instead, about 30 minutes into eating the cookies, my boyfriend proclaimed that the skunky-tasting treats were defective, so we decided to go for a second one. And then a half of a third.
And for another 30 minutes, nothing.
And then we met
If you’re a blogger, you know how hard it can be to make your site stand out in the sea of personal blogs.
Well, after years of research spent on the subject of blogging, I’ve finally discovered the secret to making your blog both popular and successful.
Have a baby.
From my calculations, having a baby is proven to increase your blog traffic by 200%-1000%.
If you’re hoping to break free from the pain of obscurity, follow these easy steps and watch your site, and stomach, grow:
1.) Have sex with someone: Your spouse, partner, friend or a turkey baster with the $20 sperm of the young, cute guy who works at Urban Outfitters. Sure he’s 19 years old, but you know you two will most likely create a child that looks like Shiloh Jolie-Pitt. AND THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS.
2.) Once pregnancy is confirmed, announce it on your blog. There are only two ways to do this:
2a.) Take a photo of your shoes, your partner’s shoes (if he/she is part of the story you are creating)
Last week I posted on my blog a survey asking childless friends, acquaintances and complete strangers why they didn’t have children. The response was terrific, and I slightly surpassed- 63-60- the amount of responders for my first poll, “Should I have children? A survey for moms and dads.” If you haven’t read the initial survey, I recommend reading it.
Unlike the first survey, this poll enabled participants to choose “other” and to explain their answers. I did not do that for the first survey because I’m a Luddite.
Below are the results from the second survey. You can also see the entire survey results and comments here.
1.) Why Did You Not Have Children?
As you will see from the first question, the majority of participants selected “I never felt the desire to have kids.” However, this question had the most comments, with many people explaining that they had multiple reasons for not wanting children, including lack of funds, miscarriages, not wanting to
A couple of months back, I posted a survey asking moms and dads why they had children. The survey stemmed from my own confusion and stress as to whether or not I, an early thirty-something, should pump out the babies.
With the survey, I had hoped that by “crowdsourcing” my dilemma, I could receive insight into “the right answer.”
Well, I didn’t.
And I knew I wasn’t going to.
Having children is personal and unique to all of us, and no one can tell you whether it’s right for you. However, the survey did inform me with anonymous information on the sleeping habits, sex lives and anxiety levels of many parents, which proved to be both fascinating and terrifying. You can read the results to that survey here.
A handful of non-parents commented that I should do a reverse survey: Why didn’t you have children?
What makes a person decide not to have children? Is it by choice? Is it by circumstance? And if it was by choice, is that non-parent ok with that choice?
source- Tiny: A Story About Living Small
Dear People Who Live in Fancy Tiny Houses,
Do you actually love living in a fancy tiny house*?
You look so freakin’ happy in that Dwell Magazine article or Buzzfeed post, but c’mon, you can’t tell me that you don’t lie awake at night, your face four inches from the ceiling because the only place your bed fits is above the kitchen sink which also acts as your shower, and think, I’ve made a terrible mistake.
Look, I’m not criticizing you. I commend you for making this giant leap. Since we humans seem comfortable with pillaging Mother Earth of all her resources, I believe more people should think like you. But 250 square feet? What the hell happens when your tiny house partner farts Mexican food farts, huh? Where do you escape to? Nowhere. You have nowhere to run. All you can do is walk three feet to the other end of the house and pray.
Or maybe you can run out into the tiny forest surrounding your tiny house.
Update 10:45AM 5/19: The GM has written a response to the petition. You can read it here.
This past weekend, I spotted a petition going around from the “Wheatsville Staff Solidarity Collective Austin” asking that the beloved Austin co-op grocery begin paying their employees a livable wage. Employees at Wheatsville currently start at $9/hour, and the petition asks that their pay increase to the City of Austin’s living wage recommendation of $11.38/hour. As a person who has worked in the customer service industries, including clothing retail, tech retail and restaurants, the pay disappointed me but did not surprise me. What did surprise me was this paragraph in the petition: “We, the Wheatsville Staff Solidarity Collective, speak on behalf of all the Wheatsville employees who are routinely overstretched and undersupported by shoddy managerial practices and a corporate mentality that prioritizes sales-to-labor ratios far above employee well-being. There is much work to be done in
Are you a fan of storytelling? Do you love The Moth?
Tomorrow night I’m hosting a storytelling event at LIVESTRONG HQ, and I’m super stoked about it.
I had been wanting to put together a night where cancer survivors and non-cancer survivors alike felt empowered to share their stories in front of a receptive audience. With the help of two of my teammates, that wish is now a reality.
The theme is “new kid on the block,” and our guest speakers have ten minutes to share their stories. I can guarantee the night will be filled with a lot of laughs and some tears.
If you’re free tomorrow, stop by 2201 E. 6th St., enjoy food and drinks on us and listen to some kick-butt storytellers.
The event is free and starts at 6:30PM.
Details below and here.
Lately I’ve been on a kick of reading non-fiction by female authors. I share this unextraordinary observation because for most of my life I’ve been a lousy lady supporter. I grew up idolizing male rock stars (I mean, who doesn’t want to be David Bowie?), I had more interest in male-driven cinema (like I had a lot of choice) and I romanticized being a Kerouac or Hemingway, drunk and bitter.
(Let it be said that I’ve been madly in love Stevie Nicks since I was 15 years old.)
I don’t know where my bro allegiance stemmed from, though I have theories that I was an old Jewish man in a former life. I guess I just couldn’t relate to a lot of famous ladies. The Madonnas and the Beyonces and the Gwen Stefanis and the Jennifer Anistons have been stripped of their womanhood; they’re now cartoon versions of themselves. They drip thousands of dollars worth of jewels and designer wear, detest being photographed in an imperfect state and they live a life that is totally unrecognizable to other
LinkedIn recently notified me that I was celebrating a work anniversary: Hipstercrite is six years old.
In truth, this blog is seven years of age; it was conceived from a volatile relationship between me and Los Angeles. Eight people read the site then. It was called PlasticLA, and I mostly wrote passive profiles on the men who dumped me (I’ll never forget that one asshole who thought he was James Joyce).
Six and half years ago is when I left my career in Los Angeles and moved to Austin to work on my writing. My first year in Austin I worked two jobs and a total of 60-70 hours a week, but I made sure to chronicle my adventures of being a stranger in a welcoming city. Everything about Austin inspired me; the local community helped revive my creativity, which had laid dormant for the five years I was in the City of Angels.
And I guess I’ve never stopped writing on this damn thing. Some months I’ve written multiple times a week; some months I’ve written only once a week (like
(Update: I wrote this blog post in 2012 and just updated as of April 28, 2015)
There are an ass-load of awesome blogs in Austin, Texas.
(I think) I read a statistic somewhere that Austin has more bloggers per capita than any place in the country.
Since I have zero proof that Austin has the most bloggers of any place in America, one fact I do know is that Men’s Health Magazine labeled Austin the #8 most socially networked city in America.
Since we boast such awesome blogging talent, I wanted to create a comprehensive list of Austin bloggers for those interested in the Austin scene. We have amazing writers who cover everything from lifestyle, music, food, humor, travel and dating. Take some time and get to know these great Austinites.
If you don’t see one of your favorite Austin blogs listed that may be because a.) I’m only listing blogs that have blogged within the past six month and blog more than once a month and b.) I’m a jackass, I didn’t know that the blog existed