Writing

Hipstercrite is Lame

Lately I’ve been getting a lot more negative comments. Some on my blog and some on my column at CultureMap.

I knew this day would come and I told myself not to let it bother me. I take it as a sign that my work is reaching a broader audience, but it does sting a little considering people use harsh and less constructive language when leaving negative comments.

I came across one today on Get Off My Internets where a follower complained that I’m “super obsessed with my boyfriend”, that I’m “trying so hard to be relatable that I’m coming across as lame”, that I’m “flipping out about turning 30” and that I “overblow my life events to get more traffic-y posts”. Below that comment another person suggested that I talked about my boyfriend too much as well.

Though all these words hurt a little, it made me stop and think.

Maybe I do talk about my boyfriend a lot. For the first time in my life, I’m happy and in love. It’s gross when people talk about relationships too much, I agree, but this is such a new feeling for me. My blog has always been a place where I express what I’m feeling and I’ve never wanted to censor that.

I am flipping out about turning 30. I’m scared shitless. I’m no longer the kid I think I am. I’m getting old. People I love are getting sick or dying. I’m feeling less and less invincible.

I talk a lot about my life events. I wish they were overblown; I have such a boring life!

If I don’t talk about these things, I guess I’m a little confused as to what I’m supposed to talk about then. If I take out life events, the people I love and my current state of being, then what do I have left? If you want me to talk more about Jeff Goldlbum’s penis, I will.

Anyhoo, I’d be interested to hear your feedback. Obviously I’m not going to change my blog based off of what a handful of people said, but I am curious as to see if the direction I’m going with my blog is turning people off as much as these two folks feel.

Be as honest as you’d like.

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112 Comments

  • Reply Vince January 13, 2012 at 3:43 am

    Word of advice: Turn off the google alerts.

    That person forgot about that comment 8 seconds after they posted it…don’t lose any sleep over it.

    My career has me living a very public existence and when I got active in social media and blogging there was a time where I let those little pokes really tear me up. Now I see them as positive signs of the impact I have.

    If I’m ticking someone off I must be making some kind of difference.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 3:47 am

      Thanks, Vince. I can honestly say I don’t have Google Alerts set up for myself. Ha. I was actually Googling myself because I have a new Google+ brand page for Hipstercrite and I wanted to see where it came up on Google search. Google+ is the future, I tell ya! I appreciate the feedback. I know my skin will get thicker.

  • Reply Cathy Benavides January 13, 2012 at 3:45 am

    This is such a tough one. It’s hard not to take less-than-constructive criticism to heart. But the way I see it (as totally cliche as this sounds) when someone is pointing a finger at you, they’re point 3 back at themselves. Sometimes when I read your posts I’m like “Ugh, the boyfriend again!! I get it – you’re so in love!!” But then I ask myself “Why do I care? Oh yeah because I’m single and sad and a wee bit jealous of her sweet relationship.” Then I apologize to you in my head (for the stuff I never even said out loud). People lash out because they are insecure about themselves or some part of their life, and your writing has touched a nerve. Now I don’t know about you, but I would think that as a writer, evoking strong emotion is a good thing….. dare I say, a GREAT thing! I say keep doing what you are doing. It’s honest, it’s real, it’s your truth and it’s getting to people. Mostly in a good way, but sometimes in a bad way. And hey, maybe it’s the wakeup call some people need to really look at their own shit. Love you girl 🙂

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 3:49 am

      Thanks for keeping it real, Cathy! I totally hear you and agree. I think I might scale back the stuff about the bf anyways. It can get a little sappy. Gosh, I hope to hang out with you in real life soon. I just need to actually leave the house.

  • Reply Matt January 13, 2012 at 3:50 am

    Ya, Jesus Christ, you start the thing all bummy about “more and more negative comments” and then down bottom we find out it was just two people? Boo Hoo. Haters gon hate. I can identify with a lot of the things you write about. Not Goldblum’s penis, though. That’s why people read. Keep freaking out about major life events. Don’t start freaking out about blips on the damn radar.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 3:52 am

      Ha. Actually there has been more than just the two, but those are the two I chose to post. The other ones are kind of funny, like, “Nobody cares about you!” and stuff. Thanks for the feedback, Matt.

  • Reply Courtney January 13, 2012 at 3:51 am

    Those people had to have been reading and keeping up with your blog and posts to know what you’re talking about! Having an audience means people think they can decide they can say what is right and wrong with each and everything you do and say. I call it The Observer’s Syndrome. They’re on the bench, what else are they gonna do but criticize everyone else? You’re doing great, because YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING. High five.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:13 am

      Thanks, Courtney. Much appreciated!!!

  • Reply dan January 13, 2012 at 3:51 am

    Fuck ’em, who cares what some anonymous comments section jagoffs say? If you think they’ve got a point and they’ve signed their name, drop ’em a line to engage. If they’re just doing hit-and-run to poke at the insecurities that they only know about because you were willing to put them out there, then they’re cheap AND lazy. A critic ain’t nothing but a sandwich.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:12 am

      I like that. “A Critic ain’t nothing but a sandwich.”

  • Reply Aasim Syed January 13, 2012 at 3:55 am

    More Goldlum penis!

    • Reply Aasim Syed January 13, 2012 at 3:56 am

      I meant Goldblum… whoops.

      • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 3:57 am

        DEAL!

  • Reply Tish Haridass January 13, 2012 at 3:57 am

    I’ve been reading your blog for years now and I honestly don’t think you talk about your love life or life events too much. You have a pretty good balance of topics, considering that it is really hard not to talk solely about a boyfriend when it is as special as this one is to you.

    And even when you do write more personal posts, they’re always enjoyable, well written and relatable – which I think is important. Readers like having a little personal input once in a while, it makes us feel like there’s an actual person behind the blog.

    As for those two people, I wouldn’t take it too seriously. There are always people who aren’t going to like your work, but no one is forcing them into reading it and if they don’t like it, well it’s their loss.

    I’m studying Journalism and Media at the moment, and you’ve been one of my constant role models when it comes to blogging. I think Hipstercrite is amazing! 🙂

    Love* x

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:00 am

      Jeez, Tish. Wow. You definitely stroked my ego there. That means a lot, thank you. I try to maintain balance. I never know though. These blogs don’t come with instruction manuals. Where are you studying?

      • Reply Tish Haridass January 13, 2012 at 4:17 am

        Haha! 😛 Okay, I’m a slight groupie…

        I live in South Africa actually, studying at Rhodes University.

        • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:39 am

          Very cool! Have always wanted to go to South Africa!

  • Reply Randall January 13, 2012 at 3:58 am

    I don’t think you should worry about it. You’re posting more, and in different places, and that’s going to get you a lot of attention, not all of it positive. Especially since you’re brushing up against new markets and new kinds of readers, not all of them are going to be crazy about what you do. It doesn’t mean what you do is bad. What’s important is that said attention is still there, you’re drawing it, you’re catching the eye of new readers, and you’re still getting the work to do that.

    And perhaps more important than even that is that you’re still doing what you like, in a way you like to do it. It sounds like a lot of these things that you feel criticized for feel important and intrinsic to you doing what you like.

    We can always improve, and always get better, and there’s something to saying “okay, yeah, I do this one thing, or this other thing, probably too much.” But just like some are going to dislike it, some are going to like that about what you too, like you like what you do. And if, in your mind, you do think these are hangups or crutches or anything like that which are making your writing weaker, you’re going to have to trust yourself, as a writer, to realize that, and work them out yourself.

    I mean, seriously, not to undercut myself, but there are good places to find crit [Hipster-crit?]. Internet comments are rarely one of those places.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:05 am

      Thanks, Randall. You’re the best. Lately I def don’t feel my writing is as strong, but that’s because I’m doing it so much more now, my brain is on auto-pilot at times. Sometimes I feel like I don’t even…feel. Anyhoo, you’ve always been a big supporter of mine and for that, I’m very grateful.

  • Reply carissjaded January 13, 2012 at 3:58 am

    Well, I’d like to say ignore them but that would be completely hypocritical because people’s internet words get to me every day.

    I haven’t had too much negative feedback on my blog, mostly because i don’t write there anymore. However I do talk about my life everyday on the radio and share details the same way you do here and I did on my blog. Since I started this job I’ve gotten several very long emails from anonymous people that tell me that I’m fake and my voice is annoying and that i’m the worst thing to happen to the radio.

    At first, (and still a little now) I really let them get to me. But I always have to remind myself that if someone has something negative to say- it’s just because they’re unhappy with something else in their life. Sure, maybe I do annoy them- but they still took the time to write to me and listen to what I had to say.. which says at least I’ve caught their attention.

    Plus, it’s just two people out of the hundreds that love you. Shake it off. They’ll probably come back and continue to read your stuff. I complain all the time about how stupid magazines like “US Weekly” are… but the same reasons I complain, like “Why the fuck would I care that Lindsay Lohan is back on drugs,” are the same reasons I keep going back.

    Keep writing whatever you feel like writing. Be honest. That’s why we read you.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:07 am

      Carissa, thanks for the feedback. I didn’t know you’re on radio now. That is so cool! Where can I listen to you! I always enjoyed your blog.
      I think you’re right and I know it. I’ll get over it…now.
      Ok, I’m over it!

      • Reply carissjaded January 13, 2012 at 4:16 am

        haha BELIEVE me. People can be nasty. I accidentally even cried on air about a person taking the time to write me a 15 paragraph email about why I suck at life.

        But since then the best thing I’ve learned is just to ignore them. We have a text machine that sends in live texts during our show and i used to reply to the mean ones. Then i realized they knew I was upset and would keep writing things. FUCKEM! 🙂

        I’m on mornings on the Dudley and Bob Show on 93.7 KLBJ FM.

        • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:38 am

          Awesome! I will have to check it out. I’m not in the car often. Does it stream?

  • Reply Carol January 13, 2012 at 3:59 am

    Are those two people paying you to write your blog? I’m guessing no. If they’re not paying you, they get no say in anything.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:07 am

      HA! I miss you, Carol.

  • Reply Nana January 13, 2012 at 3:59 am

    Screw em. I’m totally cool with all the things you write in your blog. And I hope that one day (soon), I’ll be in a relationship as happy as yours.

    But I would like to hear more about Jeff Goldblum’s penis. Just a thought…

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:08 am

      Nana! Thank you! Ha. I’ll write more about Goldblum soon.

  • Reply Dg January 13, 2012 at 4:08 am

    Shake them hatahs.
    I don’t trust anyone that didn’t get at least a little freaked out at the thought of turning 30. or 32 or 33….

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:37 am

      Thanks, Deidre. You’s the best!

  • Reply jdel January 13, 2012 at 4:25 am

    wow, all the big-time bloggers i follow have been on Get Off My Internets. so it means you have made it i suppose. also, that site is fucking mean, and i dont really understand the point of it. a place where people can go and bitch publicly about how the blogs they choose to follow are bad? such a weird, negative, mean-spirited concept to me.

    i have been reading your stuff about two years now. i have also been blogging for about that amount of time. i feel like it’s getting harder and harder for me to come up with new and fresh material. when i first started, ideas just rolled out of my head. now…im like ‘yeah, i already wrote about that..now what?’ so perhaps you are feeling what i am feeling, that it’s hard to find new shit. this isnt unique to the blogger experience – at several newspapers i worked at as an editor/reporter, by the second year, i would find myself having trouble coming up with new content or new angles to cover the same story. that’s why newspapers have teams of people throwing their ideas around. we bloggers, we just have ourselves, so it’s hard.

    it just happens when you write constantly and i dont really know the answer to it. i say, keep doing what you are doing…(the boyfriend posts are cheesy, yes. but SHIT, you are happy and it’s YOUR blog. you should be able to write about him as much as you want…PLUS, it’s still a relatively new relationship for you, so of course everything he does is blog-worthy!) and keep writing about what you know, and if nothing else, this blog is a documentation of YOUR life, and so do it for yourself and not the rest of them haters.

    sorry this was mad long.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:41 am

      that was awesome, thank you.
      i didn’t know what get off my internets was until tonight. i guess i don’t understand mean-spiritedness either.
      you’re right. coming up with content every day is tough. i know sometimes what i write is crap, but i made a promise to myself to write every day.
      i really appreciate your mad long feedback.

  • Reply Ryan L January 13, 2012 at 4:34 am

    Can I say I love what you’re doing… yet still want more Goldblum dong talk?

    Or are they mutually exclusive?

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:42 am

      hahaha…thanks, snazzy. more dong talk!

  • Reply Britt January 13, 2012 at 4:45 am

    I’m really impressed with the way you’ve handled this criticism. It’s not everyday that a blogger discovers that some readers are no longer enjoying their content and actually decides to look further into that. I really respect you for that.

    I’ve noticed that some of the commenters on this post have told you to simply ignore the negativity. It’s great that these readers are so devoted, but I wouldn’t rely solely on their words. I think the fact that you’ve had complaints from multiple sources kind of shows that there might be some areas that you can work on.

    Also, please don’t be scared of GOMI. Yes, some of the people on there can be quite cruel, but for the most part, they’re a bunch of internet people – many of whom write their own blogs – who do critique others, but also mourn blogs that they used to love. In the case of your blog, both of the people in that forum thread said that they used to love your blog, but didn’t anymore. I hope you’re able to find a way to reconnect with your old readers without losing the passion that you have for your blog.

    [This comment seems quite long and preachy, and I’m not quite sure why I’m here. I’ll just stop now].

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 4:49 am

      Thanks, Britt. Excellent point. I’ve both taken into consideration what they said, but also realize that I’m not going to please everyone. I think I can scale back on the boyfriend posts and any similar “gee, look how happy I am!” posts. They can get annoying, I’m sure. As for the freaking out about 30 and talking about life events, well, tough nanushka. 😛

  • Reply Elisa January 13, 2012 at 5:30 am

    You’re the most relate-able blogger I read, don’t change 🙂

    • Reply hipstercrite January 13, 2012 at 5:33 am

      Yay! Awesome! Thanks, Elisa!

  • Reply hi January 13, 2012 at 6:10 am

    On the boyfriend thing, i don’t know if this would work as far as first time readers are concerned, but i would consider just calling him “geoff” instead of saying “my boyfriend” over and over. i once had a colleague would never call her fiancée by his actual name (Mark or Matt or something) and only referred to him as her fiancée even though we all knew who he was – “I’m going camping with my fiancée this weekend”; “What should I get my fiancée for Christmas?” and so on. It made me want to stab myself.
    Boyfriend is admittedly less obnoxious, but for some reason also a word that gets pretty irritating when used all the time.
    So anyway, I think it may be the language more than the subject matter. Generally speaking, I like hearing about him : )

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:26 pm

      Hey Hillary. Wow, that’s actually a really good suggestion. When talking to people, I’ve always referred to my boyfriend as “boyfriend” because I figure people don’t know or remember my boyfriend’s name. It’s kind of silly. I think I’ll do what you suggest.

  • Reply Amber January 13, 2012 at 6:36 am

    Your blog is magically & perfectly genuine. I appreciate it.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:26 pm

      Whoa! Thanks, Amber!!!

  • Reply Dale Wilsey Jr. January 13, 2012 at 7:15 am

    There has been one belief I’ve held steady about my writing which has helped me maintain my composure when facing negative comments.

    What I want most from my writing is to illicit some sort of response. To conjure up feelings in the reader whether those feelings be happiness, sadness, hatred, irritation, frustration, or any of the other millions of feelings we as humans can muster.

    The worst response to my writing, and writing on a whole I believe, is indifference. When someone reads something and simply says to themselves, “Eh” and moves on.

    The simple fact that you are getting reactions and getting comments and feedback, both negative and positive, means you’re doing something right. It means you’re effecting someones life regardless of what that effect may be.

    Those people complained that you speak of your boyfriend too much or “oberblow” your life to gain traffic. Obviously, these commentators have read enough to form this opinion. Which means they’re reading your words. Whether they liked them or not, they read what you wrote and had a reaction.

    Just keep writing. You can’t please everyone and should never aim to.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:29 pm

      You’re right, Dale. I know. I guess negative is better than nothing, but it still stings. Though deep down I know I can’t please everyone, I still want to. 🙂

  • Reply Aerilyn January 13, 2012 at 11:13 am

    The way I look at things is that we have a right to talk or type about anything we please, and whatever is on our minds. If someone does not like what they are reading then they have the choice to read or not.

    Whether it be negative or positive comments you are still getting readers. Let trolls be trolls it’s pretty sad they have nothing better to do than complain about posts that they chose to read in the first place.

    If it was constructive criticism that’s a different ball game, but in this aspect they need to really re-evaluate how they spend their time and think about whether they want to read your post with an open mind or be hateful that you are doing well in your endeavours. There is nothing wrong with what you post keep that in mind.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:31 pm

      Thanks, Aerilyn. I will try to remember that.

  • Reply Ana Cabral Martins January 13, 2012 at 11:28 am

    I love your blog, just the way it is. How you write and what you write about makes me less scared about the future, or the present.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:29 pm

      Ana! Wow. Really? Thank you for that.

  • Reply April January 13, 2012 at 1:04 pm

    I know it’s been awhile since I’ve commented, life with a baby will do that, but I wanted to take a moment this morning to tell you to not let it get you down. It is so easy for people to jump on the internets and start bashing via comments. It’s easy, you can say what you want, and you don’t have to look the person in the face when you say it. Would some stranger say these things to you in real life? Probably not. And in the case of friends, you would just eventually drift apart as your lives evolved and you no longer had things in common, and that’s natural. Blogs change because the people writing them change, and some readers just cannot handle that. There are numerous blogs I no longer read that I once loved because either I changed or they changed, and I no longer found the content relevant. Did I leave them negative comments? No, I just quietly “walked” away. And you know what, for every person out there who doesn’t like what you write and feels the need to leave a comment, there’s five more who like what you write but neglect to leave comments telling you so. As hard as it is to receive these comments, don’t let them get to you. I mean, and I don’t mean to downplay the importance of your blog, but if someone is actually taking the time to write something negative, and are “genuinely” upset that a blogs content is changing over time, they must not have much else going on in their life right now, so why waste your time sweating the small stuff? This all sounded much better in my head, but as I’m trying to type this while wrestling with a four month old in a poopy diaper, I don’t think it quite came across as I intended. I hope you got the message I was going for though.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:37 pm

      It came across perfectly. Thank you, April. That’s an excellent way of putting it. There are blogs that I can think of where I’ve moved on from and I still think highly of them, but I’m just no longer interested in the content. All these comment from followers has really surprised and touched me. Thank you for commenting! Good luck with the poopy diaper.

  • Reply SweatyGirl January 13, 2012 at 1:23 pm

    I read those posts on GOMI as well, and I just shook my head. I do not think that you write about your boyfriend or love life too much.

    My only thought, regarding the direction of your blog, is that I want to read more about you. Your every day life. I don’t think it needs to turn into a total life casting blog. But a little bit would be nice. I think that in order for your poignant, life-lessonesque posts would mean a lot more if we KNEW you a little bit better first.
    Does that make sense?
    I just wanna see more YOU in your posts. ’cause you’re cool.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:38 pm

      Really? I feel like my life is so boring. That’s why I write about other stuff a lot. Thanks for thinking that my life is interesting! I’m glad someone does! 😀

  • Reply Kellyn D January 13, 2012 at 1:33 pm

    Let me tell you this: I’ve been in some pretty craptastic relationships lately, and reading your blog (especially the boyfriend posts) makes me feel like there is actually someone out there for me that isn’t a total douchebag. I know this sounds super lame but you give me hope that one day I’ll meet a wonderful man and fall in love. I relate a lot to you, and I say screw the naysayers!

    P.S. you are totally cool. Don’t let some negativity get you down.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:40 pm

      Awww, thank you, Kellyn! I’ve dated so many douchebags in the past, that’s why this one just blows my mind and I guess it’s hard for me not to talk about him. I feel like a little kid sometimes. I’m glad you feel that way. Thank you.

  • Reply Jen January 13, 2012 at 1:50 pm

    As a creative person myself, I know how difficult it is to put something you love out there for the rest of the world to scrutinize. And when they do, it stings like hell. But, I think the bottom line is this: it’s YOUR blog. If they don’t like what you have to say, then they don’t have to read it. These are your life experiences communicated from your point of view. The derivative of the word blog is “web log,” which in this case is a log of your thoughts and experiences that you choose to put on the web. Embrace what you do, what you say, and who you are. It’s part of your journey, as well as that of your readership. You’re being set up for growth, so grow baby, grow!!!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:42 pm

      Thank you, Jen. Have you had to deal with scrutiny before with your work? How did you handle it?

  • Reply Courtney January 13, 2012 at 2:06 pm

    Even though a bunch of other people have already chimed in, I still feel the need to call bullshit on the haters. They’re entitled to their opinion, but I wouldn’t let it get to you. Nobody’s blogs should stay the same forever–everyone’s life changes and grows in different ways. It would be more of a shame if you had the same things to say for years and years.

    As for the boyfriend thing, whatever. I read bloggers who feel the need to bring up their husband, boyfriend, SO, in every single post. Going on and on about how happy they are and how their SO is the greatest thing ever. You don’t do that. Your boyfriend is clearly someone who’s a big part of your life and who you admire–why should you have to hide that? Unless your blog becomes solely devoted to him I don’t think it’s a problem.

    I’m a relatively new follower and I think your blog’s great–much more varied and better written than a lot of others out there. Keep it up!

  • Reply Heidi January 13, 2012 at 2:09 pm

    An honest post is always the most interesting, which is why you’re so fun to read! I shared your recent post about money with bunches of people, because I could relate to wanting to do what you love… but then being grouchy about not making any money at it!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:44 pm

      Thanks for sharing, Heidi! I try to be honest. That post got me a snarky comment from someone who said I was whiny and immature. Haha. I’ve definitely noticed that when talking about struggles people either relate or think you’re lame. I think most people relate. Which is great. I really appreciate your comment!

  • Reply Pandora January 13, 2012 at 2:44 pm

    I’ve subscribed to your blog for quite some time. I don’t get around to reading every post, but I get to a lot of them. I’ve always enjoyed your whit and your creative approach to pop culture criticism and your creative approach to criticizing yourself or, those “overblown life events” as those two nimrods put it.

    And to be perfectly honest, I’m almost 38 and I remember freaking out right before turning 30 and… well… I love my 30s. They have been way better than my 20s ever were. And for you, not that my comments are worth too much, most of the time people in their 20s drive me up the wall because they’re still so damn shallow they can’t see straight. You impressed me in your 20s, and I anticipate you’ll be even more impressive in your 30s so… keep it perspective. 😉

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:47 pm

      Pandora! Wow! First of all, that’s so wonderful to hear about your thirties. I hear that from a lot of women in their thirties and it gives me hope. Secondly, thank you for the comment about my not being a shallow twenty-something. Haha. I probably was in my early twenties and I hated myself. That’s why in my late twenties I’ve tried so hard to learn from that shitty time. Thank you for subscribing too! I really appreciate it!

  • Reply M January 13, 2012 at 2:53 pm

    Anytime you put something you made out into the world, it gives people the license to criticize. It sucks because as creative people, we are more sensitive than most, so that stuff can really sting. Chin up–falling in mutual love is a heady feeling that we always want to share with the world because it’s fucking awesome, end of story. I think if people can’t deal with your happiness, they need to get a life. Seriously. GOMI can be funny, but it can also be downright vicious and cruel, and rather arbitrary. As you and many others have mentioned, you will never please everyone, so just be yourself, which is: witty, smart, creative and a super funny, poignant and very honest writer. Criticism–real criticism, not just mean-spirited nastiness–can be helpful in order to get better and grow. So look at the valid stuff like that, and try not to waste your time on the hateful stuff (easier said than done, I know). I’ve been reading you for a while now and I think the blog is getting better and better, just MHO. 🙂

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:49 pm

      M, I’m so happy you feel that way and everyone’s feedback- negative or positive- has been so helpful. I didn’t think it would be bother me much, but it did at first. I’ve gotten over it and I’m sure there will be other nasty comments in the future, but I think my skin will get thicker. I really appreciate your kind words!

  • Reply nova January 13, 2012 at 2:57 pm

    I LOVE HIPSTERCRITE. Take that, haters.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:23 pm

      😀 Thanks, Nova!

  • Reply Vanessa January 13, 2012 at 2:58 pm

    I have been following you for awhile now, and while I don’t always comment, I do almost always enjoy what you have to say.

    I guess the point of a blog is that it gives you the freedom to talk about whatever you want. The boyfriend subject does come up a lot lately, but who cares? I know that I have a problem posting adorable pictures of my dog – like…a big problem.

    I enjoy the way you write almost more than the topics you choose, so I will continue to read on even if you are a mushy sap these days ;o) Joking.

    One suggestions? I miss your lists/countdowns!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:26 pm

      Vanessa,
      First of all, who doesn’t love pics of an adorable dog? Secondly, thank you for this. Thirdly, great suggestion on the lists! I need to do more again!

  • Reply becky January 13, 2012 at 3:18 pm

    double high 5… it’s your blog, you can write (and, dare i say you are a great writer) whatever the shiz hell you want. kudos for doing what you do, and fuck those who chose to be douches and say shitty things.
    that’s the end of my rant. keep it real, from a subscriber to your blog and someone who fully enjoys it. ~becky

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:26 pm

      Thank you so much, Becky!

  • Reply eric January 13, 2012 at 3:34 pm

    this post reminded me of something. i hate negative comments and never leave them on the blogs i read, however i don’t often comment enough on the posts i really enjoy. i LOVE your blog, and although i don’t often leave comments, your writing leaves me with a smile. great work, and please keep it up.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:29 pm

      Eric, damn. Thank you for sharing that.

  • Reply T.C. Sprencel January 13, 2012 at 3:46 pm

    I agree with Vanessa and as a fellow blogger I agree unwaveringly that if you built it, you can do whatever the hell you want with it, barring anything illegal or legitimately harmful.

    To be honest I don’t enjoy reading about your boyfriend as much as reading other stuff you write, but that’s damn sure not going to turn me away from following your blog; I appreciate the fact that you are a dynamic human being who writes compellingly on a range of topics.

    There are basically two ways to respond to haters: You can say “Fuck ’em”, or you can diplomatically engage them, as you are doing. I commend you for staying on the high road.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:30 pm

      Thanks, T.C.! You mean, I can’t use my blog as a place for pimping or drug selling? Dammit.

  • Reply Pierrette January 13, 2012 at 4:04 pm

    Absolutely RIDONCULOUS. I’ve always felt your more personal posts were your best, and very relatable. Don’t take it to heart!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:31 pm

      Thanks for the feedback, Pierrette. I’m always on the fence about my personal posts, so I’m glad that you like them.

  • Reply jackie January 13, 2012 at 5:07 pm

    I say, who gives a shit? You’re ultimately writing for yourself, to please your creativity. The followers, commenters are just pluses to it all. I think bloggers get so caught up in an “audience” and pleasing them…I just find it to be a little silly. Just write about what you like and what you feel and don’t censor or alter your writing because of an audience.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:32 pm

      Excellent advice, Jackie. I’ll try to adhere to it.

  • Reply michaela January 13, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    I like your blog a lot. I’ve been trying to start one but I find myself stuck. And lazy. Mostly lazy. I think you talk about a wide range of topics and I find them all interesting and inspiring. Don’t let the haters get you down.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:33 pm

      Thanks, Michaela. Oh, I get stuck a lot too. I just made a promise to myself to write every day. It’s hard sometimes. The moment will hit when you want to do the blog. It will come.

  • Reply Allison January 13, 2012 at 5:31 pm

    Talking about your boyfriend too much? That girl is just jealous. I know the feeling – for the first time ever I’m happy (also crazy – comes with the territory) and in love and I want to write about it a lot.

    And I’m also guessing that this commenter is in her early 20s – so has no idea how freaky it is to be closer to 30. I’m almost 28 and my life is no where near where I thought it should be by now.

    Have no fear Lauren! Your writing is amazing.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:34 pm

      Thanks, Allison. I actually got the impression that they were older men who commented. I’m not sure why. Haha. Thank you so much for your comment! Let’s take 30 by storm!

  • Reply Julie the Wife January 13, 2012 at 5:42 pm

    I’m with everyone. Fuck ’em. You have to be true to you, everything else will just come off as hollow.

    I blog about my family all the time, and being old at 40, and my period, and whatever. Strangers can’t criticize me any worse than my teenagers do.

    Keep on keepin’ on!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:34 pm

      HA! Love it! Excellent advice, Julie. You’re so right.

  • Reply Brittany January 13, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    FUUUUUUCCCCKKKK that. I don’t understand why people take the time to put negativity out in the world. It’s your blog, your life, you should write about what inspires/terrifies you.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:35 pm

      Brittany, I don’t understand either and this is my first time around with it. Have had a few kind of sprinkled between my blog, CultureMap and now this GOMI thingy. I didn’t even know what the heck it was!

  • Reply Amanda January 13, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    I like the more personal things the best – I’ve always found your blog funny but now if I’m in a hurry flipping through my reader I’m more likely to read a post with something I can relate to (worries/boyfriends/life/etc) than the funny stuff which I think “I’ll come back to later” but never do. So yes, please keep it all!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:36 pm

      Thanks for that, Amanda. That is great to know! I appreciate the feedback!

  • Reply Omar January 13, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    I like the things you write about and respect those ones I don’t. That is why I choose to read your blog.

    Btw I found it because I wanted to know more about thrift stores and google took me here and I am glad because you know about life even you are still a kid. (I am 36). Congrats and go ahead!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:36 pm

      Thank you so much, Omar! That means a lot!

  • Reply adley January 13, 2012 at 8:26 pm

    I’d take it as a sign that you have a large enough readership to bring out both the fans and some haters.

    I’ve gotta commend you for the way you are handling it though. Instead of writing a slam piece against the people who can’t keep their mouth shut, you’re opening up a dialogue and getting input to make your writing and blog better. Kudos.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:50 pm

      Thanks, Adley! I miss you!

  • Reply Tolly January 13, 2012 at 9:16 pm

    Oh Lauren. As a fellow blogger, I know just how you feel. Even if it WERE only two people who said negative things!

    I remember this one time, a long time ago, when one of my (three) Yelp reviews got Review of the Day. Someone started a forum thread about it, and it seemed like all of Yelp Austin was weighing in on it! People commented on my writing ability, my looks … here let me find this.

    http://www.yelp.com/topic/austin-todays-rotd-some-sort-of-record

    Ok here it is. Anyway, when that happened, I was like – DUDE. Internets be crazy.

    It’s such a bizarre experience being a blogger, because even though you have lots of readers, it’s still an essentially solitary experience: writing each one and posting it. I think things like GOMI are actually a good reminder that you are shaping opinion and taste, and you know what? I love your boyfriend posts. I don’t find those obnoxious at all.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:51 pm

      Tolly, do I want to click on the link? I’m afraid I’ll get angry! Wow can people do that?! You’re so right. It still boggles my mind when people read my posts. I write it alone, send it out there and sometimes forget that it reaches people. Haha. Thanks for the comment, my dear.

  • Reply Adria January 13, 2012 at 10:20 pm

    I echo so many of the previous comments, but wanted to add my own so you know just how much support you have. No matter what you write, the more people who read it the more people will have opinions of it. Is everyone going to like everything you post? No. Does it matter? No. You’re getting work as a freelance writer and you’re doing a damn good job of keeping up with your personal blog and I’m grateful for that. I enjoy hearing personal anecdotes or even full posts, it’s just as interesting, if not more than commentary on outside world events. Keep doing what you do and the people who want to stay positive will. People with negative things to say will always be out there, do NOT let them get you down. Talk about whatever you want to talk about, such is the beauty of the internet.

    🙂

  • Reply Kristy Lynn @ Gastronomical Sovereignty January 14, 2012 at 12:03 am

    honey please. i turned 31 this year and i’m definitely the kid i once was. i just hope i’m a little bit smarter and a little less drunk. it’s only a number and no more significant than the social construction of dress size. it’s all bullshit.

    that being said… i meant that in a kind way. a supportive way. chillax max! 🙂

    …and i think you can blog about whatever you wanna blog about. if someone is so bloody bored in their life that they have nothing to do but rag on you about how much you talk about your boyfriend (only close friends get that privilege), then i feel sorry for their sad little lives.

    blog on sister. blog. on.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:53 pm

      Hahaha! Has 31 been a fun year? Should I not be scared of 30?

  • Reply bard January 14, 2012 at 7:59 am

    I’d be willing to bet that the people complaining that you are talking about your boyfriend too much are men, and that they have an attraction to you and are jealous. But whether they are or not, your blog IS about you. They can choose to follow or not, to like it or not, but don’t stop being the unique, newly-in-love person that you are. It’s easy for somebody to fire off a negative comment without putting thought or effort into it, and if you’re on the Internet long enough you’ll run across a few who will.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 4:59 pm

      Haha. Bard, I doubt that, but thanks. I’m sure it will get worse. Maybe it’s better I just don’t read the negative stuff.

  • Reply mike January 14, 2012 at 3:56 pm

    I agree with one of the first comments that when someone writes a terrible comment that they forget about it three seconds later and you should as well. Don’t let it get to you. Another thing is this. Do you notice when someone writes a really mean comment about you or to you that the other commenters come to your defense? I notice that and if you notice that then you really have built a community here on hipstercrite. You don’t have to defend yourself so much or worry about negative comments your people will look out for you. Personally that’s when I know that I’ve built a community when people defend me to negative commenters. So don’t take the negative comment and think oh I will try to not talk about the boyfriend take the people who are supporting you with their comments and say wow look at that, they really support me.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:01 pm

      Thanks, Mike. The outpour of support has been amazing. I can’t believe it! It’s been so touching to see what people have to say. It definitely makes me feel like I’m doing something sort of right!

  • Reply Robin ncwritersdesk@twitter January 14, 2012 at 5:14 pm

    Girlfriend…you are an absolute “AWESOME” writer! Your style is yours, and yours alone! I find myself engrossed in your writing. I “envy” your style! If only I could express myself in such a manner.

    The thing is, you “are” reaching a wider audience. More people are recognizing your name and “who” you are! It’s merely jealousy that drives anyone who speaks negatively about your writing.

    Hey…they just want to be you. LOL! That is a “good” thing. You are completely unique! It’s going to pay off for you. Celebrate yourself, and KUDOS for not good, but great writing! 🙂

    • Reply hipstercrite January 14, 2012 at 5:18 pm

      Gosh, Robin. I’m glad you have that confidence in me. Haha. Wow. Thank you.

  • Reply Sheryl January 14, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    Lauren, having known you for a really long time, it surprises me that you would care what other people think. You have always been the type to march to the beat of your own drummer, and never really gave much thought to being “different” from other people. That being said, I just want to remind you of something that rings true in every scenario, and I’m pretty sure R. Kelly said it best. “Haters gonna hate.” Not everyone can be in tune with your quirky, funny, and sarcastic personality. Furthermore, internet trolls are going to troll. My grandfather always told me that opinions are like assholes, and there are a lot of assholes in this world. As far as turning 30, who the hell told you that is the age when you have to “grow up?” You should be proud of yourself girl! Your in love for the first time in a long time, and finally coming into your own and making your dreams come true. GOOD FOR YOU!! Get excited about being 30, because from what I hear it’s the new 20, and way cooler because you have already been through all the shit that makes people shake their heads and say, “When will she ever learn?” I am proud of you, and I love you just the way you are.

    • Reply hipstercrite January 19, 2012 at 5:37 am

      Awww…Sheryl! This made me tear up. Thank you, my dear. You’re so sweet.

  • Reply Sheryl January 14, 2012 at 8:05 pm

    P.S. What about Jeff Goldblum’s penis? Is it enormous?

  • Reply KeLLy Ann January 15, 2012 at 4:11 am

    I started worrying about 30 when I was 23. It turned out to be the BEST birthday ever {as evidenced by the BloOdy Mary drink stains that never came out of that carpet}
    35 is the number you need to worry about. That’s when the clock started for me.
    awww, boo hoo, they don’t like to hear about your boyfriend. I love reading about your Life and it’s Doings….your Life is probably what I would have been living if I had done career first and then Womb Fruits.
    Keep On Truckin!

    • Reply hipstercrite January 19, 2012 at 5:37 am

      Haha! Thanks, Kelly Ann! I will drink a Bloody Mary on my 30th birthday in honor of you!

  • Reply Tara January 17, 2012 at 7:08 pm

    Bad reviews or comments still mean they read your blog. Keep writing what you want to write. Some woll like it, some won’t. Don’t change YOU because a few people don’t like it.

    PS – 30 has been the best year of my life so far. Because I made up my mind that it would be. 🙂

    • Reply hipstercrite January 19, 2012 at 5:33 am

      Good for you and thank you for the sweet comment!

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