Writing

If The Tacocopter Was Real and Lived in Austin, Texas

Though the Tacocopter of San Francisco (“flying robots deliver tacos to your location”) has been dubbed a fake, let’s fantasize if such a thing existed in Austin, Texas, shall we?

1.) While waiting in long-ass lines during SXSW, the helicopter could plop tacos into our open mouths like baby birdies waiting for regurgitated worms.

2.) While hungover, the helicopter could rap tap on your bedroom window as you wait for death to take you. Instead of death, you’re greeted with tacos… and a robot. Which is kind of like death.

3.) While waiting in traffic on I-35 during rush hour, you can have tacos delivered to your window…and obliterate the cars in front of you.

4.) While waiting in line at Franklin’s you can snack on tacos…because after two hours of waiting, you’ll be hungry enough again to eat at Franklin’s.

5.) While hanging out at Barton Springs, you don’t have to leave your spot and worry about an old man in a thong taking it. Instead tacos and memory-erasing pills to get rid of images of old men in thongs can to be delivered to you!

6.) While hanging out at Liberty and you spot your ex, you can have Tacocopter swoop in and use its little tentacles to bitch slap him/her…and give you a taco.

7.) You can program Tacocopter to locate Ryan Gosling anytime he’s in town…and give him a taco.

8.) You can program Tacocopter to take breakfast tacos to a famished Governor Perry… then take them away from him.

9.) You can program Tacocopter to build “Tacoland” on the edge of town where streetlight are made of tortillas and the streets are paved with cheese.

10.) Fly away with Tacocopter to a remote island and make taco babies.

 

Add your own Tacocopter wishes in the comments!

Previous Post Next Post

You Might Also Like

6 Comments

  • Reply carrie March 28, 2012 at 9:04 pm

    the rick perry one is golden.

    • Reply hipstercrite March 31, 2012 at 5:49 pm

      😉

  • Reply Tim March 29, 2012 at 2:03 am

    Seriously. One of you Type-A morning people needs to get on the breakfast taco delivery service. All us hung-over night-owls will pour money into your pockets.
    I’d do it myself. But it would be a disappointment for everyone involved when I didn’t show up because I was hungover.

    • Reply hipstercrite March 31, 2012 at 5:58 pm

      Someone told me about a taco truck in Austin that would come to your house whenever you called it. Sounded like a genius idea. Not sure what happened to it.

  • Reply Cindy March 29, 2012 at 2:05 am

    Somewhere in these feats of taco delivery is a new super hero!

    • Reply hipstercrite March 31, 2012 at 5:58 pm

      Cindy, I could see Geoff being a taco super hero! (and pizza)

    Leave a Reply to Tim Cancel Reply