source: Vice Magazine
I’m neither good at writing poems or having periods…
…And I apologize for alienating my entire male audience today.
I hate you!
Like a seal hates the polar bear
You gobble me up
Chew on every inch of me
And when you’re done
You spit me out
Like a wad of flavorless gum
You sit behind my eyes
And knock knock knock
Trying to break down the door
And when that doesn’t work
You travel down to my stomach
Where you perform your exercise:
Chin-ups and sit-ups and spinning and tread
I’ve always underestimated your powers, Period
Your strength is something I can no longer ignore
We all know you, yet we’re victims to your will
You give us so much
Yet take so much away
See that man over there?
I want to punch him in the face.
Want to know why?
You tell me, Period.
You tell me.
You leave me hopeless
And angry at the world
We think we have control over you
But in reality we don’t
We’re on the receiving end of your Svengali trip
And there is nothing we can do about it.
If the poem doesn’t freak out your male readers, that photo certainly will.
I also have a hate/hate relationship with my period.
Yeah, and I picked one of the photos that was least “IN YOUR FACE!”. Some others were worst.
What the fuck is up with this period fashion photo spread to which that photo belongs to??
I know! Isn’t it crazy? I saw it the other day and was immediately like, “Eeewww!”, but like most things Vice does, it got me thinking about it. Damn you, Vice!
Once you see a baby almost impossibly emerge from a vagina, photos like the above are a lot less disturbing 🙂 You can’t scare me off!
I’m really glad I found this poem today, I’ve been feeling pretty hateful towards my period all week now, and reading this helped lift the tension 😉
Good! I hate it so much!
I almost died when I scrolled down to see the rest of the photo. And wretched.
Yeah, it’s an interesting photo…
God hates women.
God hates periods too.
Three letters: I. U. D. Haven’t had a period (or a baby) in 7 years, and 3 left to go on I.U.D. number 2, at which point I’ll get another one. Best invention since everything.
Agreed! Heck I’ve had my IUD for less than a year and haven’t had a period in almost 3 months. They gradually got less and my PMS symptoms don’t suck as much either. It’s amazing! Try it!
baaaaah i didn’t even notice the bottom of that photo until i read the comments.
it happens to the best of us…
Once I had a girlfriend who’d mark the calendar with little red skulls & crossbones… (and it wasn’t because she had any interest in pirate radio…)
I found this to be a boon for me, as I could more effectively schedule my stays in the bomb shelter while placing duct tape firmly over my lips…
HaHa Very smart man lol.