Last week I wrote a post about an ex, calling him both “the worst boyfriend and best ex-boyfriend I ever had” and listing examples on why. The post was written in jest and I firmly believed that he wouldn’t read the post due to his acknowledgement while dating that he could give a shit about my blog.
I was wrong.
Someone brought the post “to his attention” (way to go, ass!) and I got a somewhat angry email from him the next day.
I apologized, explained that the post was meant to be light, and that I would remove it if he so desired.
I have not heard from him but I removed the entry anyways.
This is not the first time my blog has gotten me in trouble with someone close in my life. My parents and I now have an understanding that they are to never read my blog, unless I specify a particular post. If they do go to that post, their eyes are not to deviate elsewhere on the page. This isn’t a rule that I mandated, but an observation they figured out themselves. Though my mother has not pointed out any specific blog posts that have upset her, my Dad very clearly got angry at me over a post about Prince’s pubic hair. My father then told me that he was going to drop me as his Facebook friend and a child-like argument ensued that somehow got my mother involved as the mediator (my parents have been divorced for twenty years).
These situations have made me realize that there many areas of my life that I can not discuss on my blog. This is often makes writing difficult, for when those particular areas of my life are crowding my brain like a drunken and rowdy elephant in an elevator, I don’t feel that I’m able to discuss them. Nor am I amble to discuss them months later without potentially pissing off the person that the story may involve.
Believe me, I’d love to discuss the man I looked up to when I was just a little young thing in LA and who categorically disassembled my trust. I’d love to write about the seventeen months I wasted at my last job and the ridiculous hours and tasks I endured for little pay. I’d love to discuss how the only dude I’ve ever really given a shit about almost comically reacts to me as though I’m a leper. I’d love to talk about the gentleman I went to the LCD Soundsystem show with and how he used my shoulders as a drum kit, clapped my hands for me, and (erroneously) introduced the name of each song as if I had no idea who I was currently watching. I’d love to discuss how one can be interested in someone but realize that absolutely nothing about you and he mesh. I’d love to discuss my fear and constant battle of becoming completely ambivalent and apathetic towards everything due to the undercurrent attitude that flows through Austin.
But I’m not and I won’t.
Mostly because it makes me sound like a whiny turd, but I also don’t want to piss anyone off.
“But you shouldn’t care what people think!” a few friends have said to me.
But shouldn’t I?
At least the people in my life whom I care about?
The Blum wouldn’t get mad at me. He’d take me in his big, Jewish arms and whisper jazz standards in my ear.
Have you ever gotten in trouble with someone in your life for discussing them on your blog? Have you lost a job over it? Offended family members? Do you find it difficult to know what personal items to discuss on your blog and what not to discuss?